so for the past few days iv noticed my cat has gotten bigger, this is all after she escaped one day a few weeks ago shes been hiding ALOT more during the day when im home and she use to ALWAYS be on the kitchen counter and now she hiding on-top of the cabinets in the kitchen and has piled stuff up so no one can see her. i can not take care of her and kittens...so i need to get rid of the kittens when they are able to be given away...

You need to give her a quiet and comfortable place to give birth and she needs to be fixed.

Make sure she has a comfortable spot where she will feel safe and not be bothered by too much noise and commotion.

well she ran away today...i spent over an hour looking for her to no avail...she didnt go to her normal spot so i searched our entire lot and the whole lot across teh street where she normally goes (my lot is 75' wide by 660 foot long)

She might be looking for a place to give birth. Umm, find and trap her because an outside birth can be dangerous. Kids, dogs, birds, anything can become a predator to her kittens. Call the animal shelter and chances are they can assist you in trapping your cat. Make better precautions in keeping her inside too, you need to research cat pregnancy and birth and kitten rearing to make this successful. Also, once the kittens are weaned get the momma spayed ASAP to prevent future pregnancies bc I guess your aware of the hundreds of thousands of unwanted animals dying in shelters every year.