For feeding, I unlock and pull the top off of her cage, then use a set of tongs to wiggle a mouse in front of her. Just like you'd do with pretty much any other snake. I don't feed live animals to my snakes.
Right now, I am just guessing she is a female from a quick guess of tail size. (Not rattle size.) Generally males have a longer tail... but that method is really not reliable. Once she is calmed down and established I will take her out, let her crawl up a narrow, long tube that she cannot turn around in and then use a small metal probe to be sure.
Many snakes do just fine in aquariums for their entire lives... venomous ones included. Snakes are not overly active animals, much of their time is spent sitting in one spot and waiting for food to come by. If one spot isn't good, they'll move to another spot. In this way, captivity for some species is almost an ideal situation. Of course, aquariums are not the safest and most secure means of keeping venomous snakes. You need something with a locking lid - and many a keeper has been bitten through a screen top.
In the long run, the general care of venomous snakes is no more difficult than that of other snakes - which leads alot of people to get over their heads. It is the handling that is the problem... and with any animal, you have to handle it at some point to check its health, to remove it for cage cleaning, and so forth. If you ever watch Croc Hunter. That is a perfect example of improper handling techniques... and only by the graces of God, and by him knowing how those animals are going to react with some quick reflexes, is he still with us today. Myself, I use tongs, hooks and buckets. Once in captivity, snakes get used to this process and learn how to hang on a hook, get familiar with being put into holding buckets temporarily, so it really is not a difficult process. Just one that the keeper has to be constantly aware of what is going on. Myself, if I'm even feeling a little groggy one day, I won't work with those animals. I don't want anything throwing off my focus.
Anyway, venomous keeping for me, it was the next logical step to my reptile keeping hobby. I have had many, many non-venomous snakes, but instead of running out and buying a dangerous animal, I started with wild handling - you know, removing animals from other people's property. I really hate it when people kill snakes on their property... snakes are very inoffensive animals, all they want is their food, some sunshine, and to be left alone. But people think rattlesnake, and automatically assume its chasing them down to kill them and their immediate family. Anyway... from there, I started taking rescues from people who got into the hobby, and realized that they were over their head before they ended up in the hospital... or abandoned animals... and even a few wild rehabs that were unreleasable.
In the long run, with proper handling techniques and a responsible and knowledgable keeper, venomous snakes make interesting additions to captive a collection. There are probably alot more of them out there than you would imagine - but you are right, its is definitely not for everyone, and just because someone has had a ball python before it doesn' t make them ready for a rattlesnake. People ask me all the time "How do I know I'm ready for a venomous snake?" and I always answer with the same thing. If you have to ask yourself that question, you aren't ready.
Honestly, some large pythons are just as dangerous in the hands of an irresponsible keeper as any venomous snake.
Well, hopefully that answered your questions.