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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I think Rafi has a pituitary tumor. He's been going downhill for about a week now, but I couldn't admit to He's exhibiting much of the signs we looked up. Loss of control of his arms and legs, arms and legs held to the front when picked up, refusal to eat, loss of coordination(he stands up on his hind legs to look around, and loses balance), he's become very cuddley, in fact I finally realized something was seriously wrong yesterday because his extremities were cold, and every time I tried to put him back in his bed, where there was a heating pad, hoping that he could sleep whatever this was off... he'd use all his will power to lunge himself onto the cage door and cling with all his might until I picked him up.

Now he's shying away from Edgar and Bram grooming him.

..I know drugs can alleviate his symptoms, and can never treat it. But honestly, I don't think there's much left of *Rafi* to save. He looks at me, and I feel like he's saying, with whatever part of him is locked away or evaporating, "I'm ready, mom. I love you and dad, but I need to go. I need to watch over you elsewhere, but not here, not in this body."
 

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Sweet Rafi. And such a short time with him. :(

My Jeffrey told me the same thing when he was ready. It was such a hard, hard week. I know you've loved him so much. It's so rare these guys have someone deserving of them who will give them a great life. I'm thankful you are there for him even for such a short while. There's just something extra special about those willing to love our oldies.

I know it's hard, but you'll do well by him. There's nothing more selfless in my mind, than being able to honor our fur babies needs over our own, even when it breaks our heart. And he is always there, even when his tired body isn't.
 

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Discussion Starter · #3 ·
I look in his eyes, and he's so, so, lost. He just needs a little bit of help. It does break my heart to have him PTS .. this will be my first time. But it hurts my heart more to see him lay there, staring away. :(
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
No time for PTS. Rafi is gone. A few quick breaths, a rub on his nose, and he was gone. I feel... so much relief, that he can finally go to where he needs to go. I miss you Rafi, I have a hole in my heart that will never be filled, but onward home you go.
 

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It's kind of a relief to me too to hear this. I've been thinking of you all day. Its so good that he was with you to the end. And so much better for them when they go at home where they're comfortable and not fearful and stressed.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
That...really means a lot you were thinking of me. I am new to the rat community, and it helps to know we were noticed. Thanks for that.

My lap is lonely, though :( Because the baby boys are still too little to sit still. Edgar is pretty mellow, though. Rafiki was his big brother. His mentor, it seemed like. Perhaps Edgar will fill my lap next. =\ I'll have to include pictures of them in a little bit.
 

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Flickering,


Oh, I am so, so sorry. :(


I saw another post that you left of your other kids and I commented on it, but I did not know yet that Rafi had passed away. I just now read this post.



It just broke my heart to read your post but you were so sensitive and keen to how Rafi was feeling, and thank the gods you were able to tell that he was ready to go.



Like Story said, letting our babies go when they are not enjoying this world anymore is a selfless act that is done for their benefit, not for ours.



You were right to know instinctively that even if drugs or other methods might have kept him alive, it would have been to make you happy and not him. That is incredibly sensitive and thoughtful of you to realize that.



Luckily, he was able to pass on in the comfort of his happy home, near Mommy, and that is such a nice thing.



I wish my own boys had been able to go that way. We had to make the tough decision with PTS, after trying so hard to save them with the hospital trips and oxygen tanks and finally realizing that our babies had just..had..enough. I knew they were not having fun anymore and they just wanted to go. Either way, it still hurts so much to lose your baby. Just remembering that time period is making me tear up as I type this. I bawled like a baby and practically became hysterical at the clinic when it happened. SO....we all know the hurt. It runs very deep. I really feel for you right now. :(


Again, I am so very sorry. Rafi was loved so much and he was a very lucky boy to have such a loving and happy home with you. And yes, relief is a good thing to acknowledge because now you know he is not suffering anymore. That is such a good thing to remember. I know he is very comfortable, pain free and happy right now...and smiling. :yes: And that is what will help you next time you are feeling that hurt, I think.



My kisses and love go out to him. I am sure he is surrounded with lots of new ratty friends from right here on this forum that have passed, including my own kiddos, Storyseeker's, Breyer's, Lilspaz's and many more ratties, and he is having a wonderful time. It is just so very hard on us humans that get left behind, yes?
 

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Discussion Starter · #8 ·
Thanks, Vlad :) I really feel for my fiance, too, who became all mopey yesterday. He didn't hold Rafi nearly as much as I did(because Rafi peed on him the first day here, and he never trusted he wouldn't do it again after that, lol - Boys will be boys....), but loved him to bits, and nuzzled him and held him in his hands. He was mopey until I took Bram out and handed him to him. He likes Bram's...uniqueness, so I figured he'd be a good remission rat for him. I was right. :) My fiance perked right up. And Edgar is my remission ratty.

..But my lap is still cold. I cannot believe we only had Rafi for 3 weeks.
 

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I am so sorry for your loss. It was so wonderful of you to take Rafi in when his previous owners just pushed him away. You have such a big heart. You are in my thoughts, and so is Rafi. I know his last 3 weeks were very satisfying for him, its just so easy to tell that you both loved eachother . <3 may he stay in your heart but now be free of any pain. Hopefully he gets to see all of our fur babies who have already passed and went over the rainbow bridge. Hugs and kisses
 

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Summerclara said it so well. He was so lucky to have three wonderful weeks with you. I had no idea you only had him for such a short time though!!! Only three weeks! I guess I did not know the back story on Rafi. Was he sick when you adopted him or did that just happen after you got him? Either way, I am SO glad you adopted him and gave him a loving home for even a short time.
 

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Discussion Starter · #11 ·
Summerclara did indeed. Thank you. I'm pretty sure he had the tumor before we adopted him, but being my first rat, I thought his sluggishness was just a mixture of boredom and being old =\ He never ate really well. The days he ate the best were the first couple of days he was here, and when we introduced him to his little brothers. But he was "meh" about his food after that, but again, I just figured he was lonely because he wasn't living with his little brothers yet while we built a baby-proof cage. And ..I was wrong, I guess. =\ He was ill, not bored.
 

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Poor baby. :(

Rats live for the moment and a minute in their lives is probably ten-fold to one of ours, so I know his three weeks with you were treasured and he loved you and would thank you if he could, for loving him and taking him in. He will always be around you.
 

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Absolutely!! That is the best gift you can give a rat. A home, with love. You are so correct. :)
 

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You did well by him. :)
 
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