[BarkingPup]

So I'm having an issue with my parents. I live on their property in a separate house and pay rent. When I got my cats I would let them out during the summer (we live in the country, no neighbours) with tagged harnesses and watch them carefully. They liked it, no problems.

My parents, however, decided that my cats were being deprived. First, it was "oh, don't worry we'll watch them while you're at work/away." They always lost sight of them and then wouldn't help me find the missing cat. Instead, they preferred "She'll come back when she's hungry." It progressed to my parents letting the cats outside without the proper supervision or harnesses while I was away. Needless to say, I was pissed and told them off.

And now dad has just left after informing me that they've been doing it again. I thought I didn't trust my parents before... well, it's just gotten worse. I feel horrible for feeling like I can't live here because they're going behind my back. At the same time, I can't leave because I'm currently in the midst of an employment transition and schooling decision and the cheap rent makes my life a lot easier.

My parents obviously don't respect my boundaries. They have a key for my house and, after I set up some simple traps, I've discovered they're frequently coming inside my house without my knowledge. I knew having parents as landlords was bad, but this bad?! And I don't know how to stop it! I'm taking a step and buying a magnetized notepad for the door so they don't write all over my stuff in an effort to pass me notes. I'm also tempted to get a simple alarm system but that would only work when I'm home...

I just... I don't know. At the moment I just want to up and leave, no matter how much harder that would make my life. I'm... beyond angry at this. It's putting my cats lives in danger, it's disrespecting my space, it's everything I dreaded when I started living here.

Any suggestions?

 

[Nibbler]

have you considered calmly sitting down and talking to them and explain your rights as a tenant or perhaps looking into new apartments,

 

[somebody]

Change the locks.

How terrible for you to not be able to control your cats' safety. I'd be afraid to leave the house.

What on earth is it to them that you keep your cats in, where they are SAFE and will live longer healthier lives?

Put inside bolts on all the doors, so you only have to change the lock on one door. Bolt the others when you aren't home.

 

[AlliCat10]

IMO
Shouldn't matter if they are your parents and it is their house!!!! You RENT from them and like any OTHER tenent they have NO right to go into the home if you are not there UNLESS you ask them to. If they had someone else in there would they be going in to the house still I should hope NOT! You should be no different then any other renter, you are paying them, and if you ask them to put harnesses on the cats before letting them out they should respect that you care so much about them and do that for you other wise leave them alone till you get there, they would be fine waiting for you.

 

[BarkingPup]

have you considered calmly sitting down and talking to them and explain your rights as a tenant or perhaps looking into new apartments,

I was hoping to avoid the legalese because... well, they're my parents. It doesn't give them any more of a right to do stuff like that. My Mum and I have been known for our screaming matches so I'd like to keep away from the serious stuff until they cross the line again.

I've been perusing apartments casually for a while but the prospect of spending that much on rent while trying to save for school is daunting. I'd have to get a different, better paying job, etc. Roommates is another topic I've heard horror stories about...

IMO
Shouldn't matter if they are your parents and it is their house!!!! You RENT from them and like any OTHER tenent they have NO right to go into the home if you are not there UNLESS you ask them to. If they had someone else in there would they be going in to the house still I should hope NOT! You should be no different then any other renter, you are paying them, and if you ask them to put harnesses on the cats before letting them out they should respect that you care so much about them and do that for you other wise leave them alone till you get there, they would be fine waiting for you.

That's what I was thinking. It's been getting ridiculous lately (what with bringing people in the fix the pressure tank without my knowledge).

I think I'll just go over and talk to them about it and steal their key. Tell 'em they've had they're chance but abused it too much. I hate having to do it...

 

[somebody]

Taking the key is a good idea too. I hope they don't have any extras lying around.

If they continue to go in after you take the key, you'll have to change the lock. If you are handy you can do it yourself, if you aren't, ask a friend. It's not difficult to take out an old lock set and put in a new one.

I'd hate for it to take a tragedy with one of your cats to put some sense into them.